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Tag: creativity

Congrats on September Kinky Scribbles

Congratulations to all the participants of my September Kinky Scribbles Challenge! I’m so proud of all the writers in our community who gave this event a try. The goal of the event was to help people write and release stories quickly to help build confidence and have fun seeing what we could create.

Together, twelve participants worked for a cumulative 24.5 hours to write 15 different stories, growing our total collective output to a massive 28,487 words!

 

Participants

Please join me in celebrating and supporting these writers by reading their work and sharing it to your friends! If you’re able, please consider following them on social media and sending a tip or subscribing to their Patreons.

In alphabetical order by author:

Don’t see your story listed here? Check that you followed my parameters, like including content tags and posting it someplace public where I could find the hashtag. You can message me on social media or email me if you think I missed it.

Reminder: this is not a contest and I have some hard limits due to past trauma, so I will not be reading all the stories. I will only include links to public stories, and stories that offer content tags. For accessibility and consent, if your stories include themes from the Top 15 Content Tags and you do not tag them, I will not share those until you add tags at the start of the story. I reserve the right to not feature a story for any reason.

 

Some compassion & calibrating expectations

I know there are folks out there who may have wanted to start or finish a story and were not able to, because of life or health or the need to rest, or simply not knowing what or how to write the kind of stories you want to see. I am sending you so much love. There have been so many days when I can’t write, either. This event was harder than I thought it would be, because reasons, and I seriously considered bowing out. Controversial opinion hereit would have been okay if I had.

Sometimes these things move in cycles. Sometimes creativity stays out of reach for a long time, and that’s especially true for writing erotica with that added dimension of sexuality. If you’ve never heard of the Dual Control Model of sexuality (I have a short thread on it here) I’d also suggest there’s a similar model for creativity. Sometimes no matter how much we want to be creative, there’s a lot of stuff weighing down our minds and bodies, and we have to take care of those thingsand ourselvesbefore we’re able to explore and go the speed we’d prefer.

pseudo_size and I were talking yesterday about the differences between writing a novel or long story, and writing something like a Kinky Scribble. She pointed out that a scribble actually raises stakes by demanding you write a scene or whole story in 24 hours. Which is true! Some people might find the time frame raises the stakes in a way that doesn’t work for their brain or current situation.

For me, the deadline helps me overcome my desire for perfection because the ridiculous time frame forces me to give up my desire to make it The Best Story I Can Write. I put up with high stakes in timing so that I can benefit from the low stakes of quality.

On the other hand, writing something with a long (or nonexistent) deadline allows for flexibility that’s super important to folks with mental or physical health issues, people caring for kids or older family members, or those with demanding jobs or other responsibilities. There is tremendous freedom in being able to say “Welp, I wrote four words today, but that’s four words that I didn’t have yesterday. If I have more energy/mental clarity/time/quiet tomorrow, I can try again.” Flexibility like this, low stakes in timing, is something that has been vital for pseudo as they write and edit their erotic novel, Eve’s Boutique. 

I know I relied on it too, for my longer projects like Dare You Not to Grow, which came to 14,000 words in six chapters. I wrote the first draft in March of 2022, gave myself eight months to edit the story and seek a beta read, published the first chapter in November of 2022, then promptly took a mental health hiatus that meant the final chapter didn’t see the light of day until February 2023. That’s eleven months. Nearly a year of flexibility, grace, and self-compassion for a single story, because I cared a lot about it and wanted it to be as high quality as I could make it. In these situations, low stakes in timing made it possible for pseudo and I to put high stakes into quality.

In reality, most creative endeavors are probably going to be a balance of these factors. I don’t want people to think I’m advocating for all stories to always be written this way.

Sometimes you want a NaNoWriMo mad dash to the finish line, just to have words on a page you can edit later. Sometimes you want to take a year or more to craft a story with care, making art you are deeply, enduringly proud of. Sometimes you just want to write a story and take your time, but not too much time, and have a balance of time and quality. Different creative projects require different tools. Use whatever feels best for you and your story!

One of my favorite moments this month was when someone told me that this Kinky Scribble Challenge helped them improve as a writer because they participated. I feel the same way. Thank you all for joining me on this wild ride. I’m so proud of us all! Wonderful work, everyone!

2022 Recap on Creativity & Rest

(Content tags: this article contains discussion of sex, masturbation, mental health diagnoses, C-PTSD, size dysmorphia and AiWS, dissociation, burnout, panic attacks, grief, and shame, balanced with a variety of positive emotions like gratitude, hope, and determination.)

 

Instructions for Living A Life:

Pay attention.
Be astonished.

Tell about it.

—Mary Oliver

 

Achievements in context

This has been a difficult year for so many. As I see the 2022 retrospectives roll past on the timeline, I feel a mix of pride in myself and my own accomplishments, and a wish that I could put some of it in context for anyone else out there who also feels inadequate. If you feel like you haven’t done enough, or if you’re afraid to take a break because you won’t be productive, this is for you.

This year I wrote more fiction than I ever have in my life, more than 120,000 words. That’s clocking in at 2.4 NaNoWriMos! I published 80,000 words to this blog. I recorded and edited six author-read audio tracks. I also wrote a significant amount of nonfiction, including three free community resources, one of which I presented at SizeCon.

Fiction, poetry, and audio:

Nonfiction:

A horizontal graph showing word counts from 2021 compared to 2022. In 2021, Elle published 21,000 words of fiction compared to 60,000 in 2022. In 2021, she wrote 34,000 words in total and in 2022 she wrote 120,000 total. Please contact her if you'd like a full list of figures to compare.
Such a long bar graph you have, there. Is that a personal best wordcount in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?

I’m very proud of this achievement. And a lot of it has only been possible because my life happened to fall apart in a very specific way. There’s some socioeconomic privilege at work here, and other factors I won’t share for privacy reasons.

My life was in upheaval this year. I experienced two traumatic losses, one of which was to due to COVID in spite of vaccines and boosters. When the living situation at our last place became untenable, my polycule moved again for the second year in a row. I burned out completely on my entire nonprofit career, had two full breakdowns, and took five hiatuses from Twitter/writing that amounted to at least six months of “unproductive” rest and healing.